Becoming a parent changes everything — your body, your mind, your relationships, and your sense of self + purpose. In all the sweeping changes, it’s common to wonder, “Is what I’m feeling normal, or is something wrong?” The answer isn’t always simple since there’s a vast range of what can be considered “normal” with your emotional and mental health in the perinatal (pregnancy + postpartum) period, and it varies with each individual mom depending on your unique traits and set of life circumstances. While every new or new-again mom can significantly benefit from individualized professional care + support during the perinatal period, there are also distinctions between when it’s a helpful suggestion vs. when it’s highly recommended.

Below is a general guide that can be used to help you recognize these differences, what’s part of the expected perinatal adjustment, and when it’s time to reach out for more formal support.

What’s Normal In Pregnancy + After Baby

Throughout pregnancy, and into the weeks and months after birth, it’s common to experience emotional ups and downs (mood swings, weepiness, or irritability and to feel overwhelmed by the new responsibilities of caring for a baby. Fatigue and exhaustion from the demands of pregnancy and taking care of an infant, compounded by the chronic loss of sleep can also make it harder to think clearly — commonly called “mom brain.” Even fears about the future, and if your life + relationship will ever get back to “normal” can all be part of the experience. The changes you’re going through don’t mean you’re failing — they mean you’re human, going through a pretty major life transformation.

• Mood swings throughout pregnancy, and/or weepiness in the first 1–2 weeks (also called the “baby blues”).

• Feeling overwhelmed by the responsibilities of pregnancy or caring for the baby.

• Fatigue and mental fog from disrupted sleep.

• Appetite and sleep changes tied to the pregnancy or baby’s schedule.

• Needing more help than you expected.

• Wondering who you are now, feeling your identity shift.

• Feeling less connected to your partner during the adjustment.

• Occasional worries about your baby’s or your own health and safety.

• Occasional intrusive thoughts that are bothersome but easily come and go.

• Crying more easily than usual.

When to Pay Closer Attention

Signs You Need More Professional Support

Some of the most common emotional + mental health experiences in the perinatal period include —

If sadness, anxiety, or overwhelm last more than a couple of weeks for you, if you feel like they’re getting worse, or if they make it hard to enjoy daily life, it’s time to get support. Feeling detached from your baby, having constant worry, or experiencing scary, intrusive thoughts are also signs to check in with a professional. You’re not failing — you’re going through something that’s common and treatable, and help is available.

• Sadness, anxiety, or mood changes lasting more than 2 weeks or getting worse.

• Feeling hopeless, trapped, or unable to cope.

• Extreme exhaustion that makes it hard to function even when you have rest.

• Appetite or sleep disturbances unrelated to the pregnancy or your baby’s needs.

• Withdrawing from others or avoiding help.

• Loss of interest or joy in things you used to enjoy.

• Persistent relationship conflict or emotional disconnection.

• Constant, intrusive, or panic-inducing thoughts you can’t control.

• Thoughts of harming yourself or your baby (please seek help immediately).

These may be indicators of a Perinatal Mood and Anxiety Disorder (PMAD), which is a common, highly treatable condition resulting from pregnancy or postpartum adjustment. As many as 1 in 5 new moms experience a PMAD, and they can affect anyone regardless of background or circumstances. PMADs can appear anytime during pregnancy or within the first year after birth, and include the following —

• Postpartum Depression (PPD) – persistent sadness, hopelessness, or loss of interest in activities you once enjoyed.

• Postpartum Anxiety (PPA) – constant worry, racing thoughts, physical tension, or restlessness.

• Postpartum Panic Disorder – sudden episodes of intense fear, heart palpitations, or difficulty breathing.

• Postpartum Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) – intrusive, unwanted thoughts or mental images, often about the baby’s safety, that cause distress.

• Postpartum Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) – flashbacks, nightmares, or heightened anxiety following a difficult birth or traumatic perinatal event.

• Postpartum Bipolar Disorder – mood swings that include extreme highs (mania) and lows (depression).

• Postpartum Psychosis** – a rare but severe and potentially life-threatening condition that requires immediate medical attention, with symptoms that can include delusions, hallucinations, extreme irritability, and manic behavior.

  **If this is you, please call your doctor or 911, or go to your nearest emergency room for immediate care.

It’s so important to remember that you are not alone — and you are not broken.

With the right support, recovery happens and reaching out is a sign of your strength. Please contact me if you think you might be experiencing a PMAD and I will help get you connected to the support you need.

Where else can I get help?

Crisis + Immediate Support

• 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline – Call or text **988** (U.S.)

• Crisis Text Line – Text HOME to 741741 (U.S. & Canada)

Information + Resources

• Postpartum Support International (PSI) — https://www.postpartum.net

  Worldwide network offering information, support groups, links to other resources, free peer support groups, and a 24/7 helpline (call or text 1-800-944-4773 – English & Spanish available).

• The Blue Dot Project – https://www.thebluedotproject.org

  Awareness campaign dedicated to supporting and de-stigmatizing maternal mental health issues.

• MotherToBaby — https://mothertobaby.org

  Evidence-based information about medications, exposures, and their impact during pregnancy and breastfeeding.

• Postpartum Progress — https://postpartumprogress.com

  Peer-led blog and community focused on maternal mental health recovery stories.

• American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) — https://www.acog.org/womens-health

  Guidelines and patient resources on pregnancy, postpartum, and mental health.

• National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) — https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/perinatal-depression

  Educational materials and research on perinatal depression and anxiety.

• National Maternal Mental Health Hotline – Call or text 1-833-943-5746

  Free, confidential and 24/7 mental health support for mothers + their families during and after pregnancy, available in English and Spanis